Cheetham Hill to Miles Platting (by hovercraft)

from by Big Block 454



Cheetham Hill and Miles Platting, twin stars in the Hyperborean firmament.

Miles Platting was incorporated into the City of Manchester in 1838. The origin of the name is unclear as there are no early records of the district at all. The derivation of the word "Platt" however is from an old word meaning "a small piece of ground" and "miles" is probably a corruption of the word "mills". Arguably, therefore, the placename might stand for "mills on a small piece of ground", but this is purely speculative.

By the 1870s, Miles Platting had many mills, a chemical works, timber yard, gas works and a tannery. Certainly the black grimness of the local landscape was its most notable feature. Its population was very large for the geographical size of the district and densely packed back-to-back houses were common.

By way of contrast, Cheetham Hill is blessed with a wealth of unrivalled scenic beauty, a depth that only five thousand years of history can provide, and a variety of cultures bequeathed by our numerous invaders. There are shimmering lakes, towering mountains, thatched cottages, quaint harbours and sheep-covered rolling hills. On leisurely days and fun evenings you'll discover the people, the history, the landscape and the culture, and see why Shakespeare so unabashedly called Cheetham Hill 'this demi-paradise, this other Eden'.


One fine day, whilst taking a turnip for a stroll down Kumquat Lane, I met this bloke.
His voice dripped with the languid sparkle of capricious humour.
“I’ve just bought these trousers from the Pound Shop” he announced triumphantly.
“Cotton underpants, nylon trousers” he giggled, whilst bending over backwards and clutching his sides in some vain but humorous attempt to explain the strange red pustules at the top of his thighs.
“Cotton underpants, nylon trousers” he shrieked acronymically, pointing his shrivelled yellow forefinger at my drippy, sweaty fivehead, whilst sprinkling dried pommelled rye flakes over the oozing, pustulating uvatae
“Cotton underpants, nylon trousers” he bleated a final time, before sheepishly recommencing upon his journey from Cheetham Hill to Miles Platting – by hovercraft.


from Their coats flapped like God's chops, released November 1, 2004



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Big Block 454 Hebden Bridge, UK

Since the late 80s, Big Block 454 has been making exploratory, highly individual music that encompasses rock, funk, electronica, folk music, Dadaist collage and much more besides.
Each band member is a multi-instrumentalist, but Big Block 454’s approach also encompasses the creation of sound on instruments they don’t know how to play, and those that hadn’t been invented before the band made them.
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